My grandma, my favorite grandma is old and getting older by the minute. The kind of old that isn't good or healthy. She lives hours away and its very difficult to go see her because her home is closely adjoined to the home(s) of extended family members. Family members who mean well (i'm sure, bless their little hearts). However they are busily posting personal information on facebook about grandma, so busy posting and talking about grandma that I'm not sure how they have any time to actually care for grandma. Grandma is very prideful - it runs in her family. You can't eat with her if you aren't wearing a dress shirt that buttons and has a button down collar, no hats at the table if you are male, children need to be properly trained in manners, use proper grammar when speaking to adults, she is a lady and grandpa was always a gentleman. Grandpa's sole mission in life was to care for grandma. She never drove a car, she had a drivers license, she didn't like to drive so grandpa always drove her every where. She is a horrible cook so Grandpa told everyone he loved to eat out and had gourmet taste in canned soup and sandwiches. He was a gentleman and treated Grandma like a queen.
It is breaking my heart the disrespect my family is showing my Grandma - the queen of my life. When I have made a teeny tiny reference, I was informed very loudly, very plainly - You are NOT here. I received the message. They are supposed to be putting Grandma in a home sometime soon and I hope they choose a good one, and choose it quickly. Grandma has enough money to go into a very nice home and receive the best of care. They have been paying themselves to "care" for her for years. She hasn't been receiving much care, because she hasn't required much care. However she needs care now and I want her to receive it. Care with dignity and respect. I'm glad Grandpa isn't here to see what is happening to his Queen, the love of his life. Grandma isn't really here to understand either, however I'm sure she understands enough and it's breaking my heart.
I have to go home in a few weeks. I have mixed emotions. I want to spend the time with my Grandma and will not be allowed to. I will have some time with her but not the time I want or need to spend with her. My time has already been scheduled by the precious dears. I will have to fight for every minute - I want to wait until she is in a home and I can see her more at peace however I'm afraid to wait too long.
Please remember if you are responsible for aging loved ones - it isn't about you. It is about them, be respectful and care for them - the golden rule always applies. Karma is going to be a bitch when my family gets older....
